i barfeds in our rink
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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