He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize