He asked to "fluff my boner.."
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
The best revenge is premature balding
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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