How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
