btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
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and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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