good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
