Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock