sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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