4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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