You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
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At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
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According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize