just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.