my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Watching her eat just hurts me
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
