New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.