i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
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