i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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