just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
i out mim tonsoeep
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
