Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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