i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize