i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
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i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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