Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i permit you to call me
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize