New invention idea: vibrating tampons
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.