Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?