Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.