Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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