We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
