I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
