You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Still dying that you shit outside
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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