so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.