I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN