I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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