my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize