And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
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He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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