I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
