Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Randomize