alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
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