It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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