i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..