god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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