Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night