I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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