Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I need to align my fucking chakras
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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