She announced her abortion via fbk
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
