My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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