I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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