before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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