I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
lets start a swedish sibling band together
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
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You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
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Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I smell like Dick and happiness
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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