I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
why didn't you poke me back
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
