problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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