i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize