Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
He felt like a one man threesome
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .