so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I have poison ivy on my dick
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.